September 2010
4 posts
Sep 25th
223 notes
Sep 25th
35 notes
Look, People
frangry: The description of the crazy dream you had last night will never be as cool to me as it is to you, so please, spare me the boring details.  Yes, yes, and yes.
Sep 24th
23 notes
Sep 24th
657 notes
August 2010
1 post
Aug 7th
182 notes
July 2010
6 posts
YOU GUYS
fullcredit: I just found out that the guy who played Lazlo, the weird student who cracked and lives in a closet in Real Genius: ALSO played Uncle Rico in Napoleon Dynamite: My mind has been completely blown by this news. I don’t think I’ll be able to do any more work for at least the rest of the day. Images via and via. Proof here.
Jul 31st
16 notes
Jul 23rd
152 notes
Jul 2nd
11 notes
Jul 2nd
504 notes
Jul 2nd
Jul 2nd
43 notes
June 2010
1 post
Jun 8th
May 2010
6 posts
May 28th
2 notes
May 26th
209 notes
So You Want Some Answers From Lost? →
Fuck Lost.  I tried watching it a few times and it was like listening to people tell me about their dreams.  Boring.  
May 25th
May 6th
117 notes
10 THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW BEFORE GOING ON THE... →
somethingintellectual: “When you start to speak — large images of your face will appear on monitors around the set. If you look at these images of yourself your mind will freeze up and then explode.”
May 4th
Don't Care, Do NOT care, Could care LESS
If the majority of your posts on facebook have anything to do with going to the gym, just getting back from the gym, going running, running to work off all the shitty food you ate, or working out at all, I haven’t seen any of your posts for quite some time because I’ve “Hidden” you on my news feed.  I don’t post every time I go to the bathroom, just got back from the...
May 4th
April 2010
31 posts
Apr 30th
50 Little Health Tips Every Woman Should Know:... →
fullcredit: “Eighty-six yourself after three drinks, no matter what the occasion. Anything more is a binge.” —Ob-gyn Mary Jane Minkin, M.D. This is why I don’t read these things. (via elizabethanne:channelingcarrie) If you’re gonna drink three, you might as well drink seven.   
Apr 30th
3 tags
Apr 30th
Wasn't that a 2000 thing?
Two people have offered me the fist bump today.  At work.  I can’t remember the last time I fist bumped anyone.  I feel so lame doing a fist bump.  Unlike the First Lady, it’s not really my style, yo. 
Apr 22nd
Apr 21st
Not going anywhere
Ok, New York & Company.  With the zipper, button, and three of those metal closures with the flat side that slides under the hook, I think I’m all set on the pants staying put.  Thanks for making sure I pee my pants a little every time I go to the bathroom with all the business going on at my waist. 
Apr 21st
Apr 21st
423 notes
4 tags
Apr 21st
3 notes
Becausemommasaid...
You made my day and made me smile!  Thank you!
Apr 21st
Apr 21st
249 notes
Apr 21st
Kitteh Roulette →
So what if I’ve been on this for the last 20 minutes. And will continue to be on it until I leave for work in 30 minutes.
Apr 17th
“Your ego is not your amigo.”
– Some dude on the TV (via frangry)
Apr 17th
Apr 17th
7 notes
How to live in a swamp and be three-dimensional:... →
I find it weird when a couple says “we’re” pregnant, but I guess it’s only fair. I’ve exposed Mr. Protege to the additive powers of my hourly ravioli and ice cream diet and he’s heard things about nipple infections and torn placentas that can never be unheard. Sometimes I feel like I should get…  LOL @ “THIS IS A BIG FUCKING DEAL!!”
Apr 17th
Apr 17th
Apr 16th
Apr 15th
19 notes
Apr 14th
Apr 14th
Apr 14th
I love you so much
We're vacationing right now with my husband's family and drinking a lot = I'm fiending for a cigarett and didn't bring my cigs cause I didn't want to smell like an ash tray.
Me to niece in a private moment: I want a cigerette sooo bad right now.
Niece: I have some.
Me: Sweet. Aren't you scared everyone will smell it?
Niece: I don't care.
I love young indifference.
Apr 10th
Apr 9th
Justin Bieber Does emInterview/em Magazine! →
Ok.  Seriously with this kid/lesbo. Enough.  The raccoon.  I just.  I can’t.
Apr 8th
Apr 6th
1,376 notes
I hate people who whistle. They're so smug.
Apr 6th
Apr 6th
122 notes
Apr 6th
133 notes
I don't give my money to the homeless because I...
daveholmes: (via jasonmustian)
Apr 3rd
Apr 3rd
87 notes
April Fool's - Mean Girls Edition
The only time I ever pulled a prank on anyone for April Fool’s Day was a few years ago.  An older woman I used to work with always had some type of drama going on.  One of her issues was money, so as I was walking into work I thought of a way to “fool” her.  I walked into her office and told her that her (ugly ass, piece of shit, leased) PT Cruiser was getting towed.  Here eyes...
Apr 2nd
Permission Slip Controversy  →
somethingintellectual: This email conversation between a public school “Christian volunteer” and an atheist parent is hilarious. Do click the link. (via seth-david-andrew:joehoe:mykicks:fagtasticvoyage:becabeast)
Apr 1st
293 notes